There was a church in Cecil County that had a very big-busted organist.
Her breasts were so huge that they bounced and jiggled while she played the organ.
Unfortunately, she considerably distracted the congregation.
The very proper church ladies were appalled.
They said something had to be done about this or they would have to get another organist.
One of the ladies approached her very discreetly and told her to mash up some persimmons, rub them on her breasts and maybe they would shrink in size, but warned her not to eat any because they would make her mouth pucker up and you won't be able to talk properly for a while.
She agreed to it and the following week the minister got up on the pulpit and said.......
" DEW TO THIRCUMSTHANTHIS B'WOND MY CONTWOL, WE WILL NOT HAF A THERMON T'DAY "
